N3VRM7ND

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TaeKasiD

3:39

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Waking up, another hazy afternoon
The voices in my head will surely be here soon
So alone yet so surrounded
I left to find my mind I'll return when I've found it

Don't pretend you that understand
Don't try to swipe my falling hand
I won't be a better man
So f*ck right off do you understand

A degree don't mean a fucking to me
Your experiences don't translate with me
I'm not the same as you
Or anyone else I'm nearly fucking through

At the end of the rope, slipknot screaming
A monster in the mirror, a full smile gleaming
Too bad I only live so that I can disappoint
I'm stepping off the stool, stepping up to the flash point

Too much of a roach for a suicidal overdose
50 Vallies wasn't enough, so I doubled up
Heroin was just not a fucking option
Feel your heart stopping just to wake up in the morning

Feeling more alone than you can comprehend
Everybody has somebody, or at least a means to an end
Think I need therapy? Have I tried psychiatry
I was told I can't be helped and Im better off without sobriety

Hugh functioning is what they fucking called me
I don't have to get clean so this service ain't for me
What if I don't want to live this fucking life anymore
For once you had to fucking think and instead you saved your fucking score

So don't pretend that you understand
Don't pretend that you care to relate
I'm really not an evil man
I'm just full of fucking hate

So many fucking reasons for so many different people
I can't help but stand there looking down that steep hill
It consumes you, but it's pure ecstacy
Have I even lost my mind or am I the remains of all sanity

Am I already dead? Am I living in my head
Is that why I can't die? Im already living dead
Which moment was the one? There's many possibilities
As a child of neglect or series of imbecilities

Did I really fall to my death? Did the rod go through my fucking head
Did that car hit me too hard, or'd the second one get me instead
Did that fuckin run through really fucking happen ma
Maybe I just didn't dial or pull the trigger fast enough

Or maybe someone else pulled the trigger and they got me
Only question is which one of these cunts fucking shot me
Maybe it was through those years where I'd eat acid everyday
Two Trips four trips six trips fucking eight

When I never had a clue what the f*ck was going on
Nah, I could have lost that game of chicken with a cop car
Or maybe it's from the fact that I can't help but go all in
First shot I had I weighed out a fatal dose of heroin

Jesus fucking christ who do I have to f*ck to get a funeral
No one ever takes the offer cunt it's not doable
Now I'm fucking cursed to walk this wretched fucking earth
Misunderstood so badly but always told that I don't get it

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