may we see peace before eternal rest

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Jordanisdead

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Erase mistakes that's in my past, the days when i laughed
Without subconscious worry behind the face of a mask
Haunted by the words, that i've already spoke
I want to cry, but i must make it look like i have hope
I'm a ghost, ima joke
No one knows, door is closed
Im terrified to open up, due to broken trust
Always thankful to my brothers, that's unspoken love
The planet left me petrified, scared to step outside
Life is futile, life is weak, too much grief i can't rectify
I forever hide, hidden as long as i can
Why my inner child have to die to become a man
At least to you, i'm bleeding through
My uniform, you conform, you do what they need you to
I guess i see the truth, you just eat the fruit
If i want to be an astronaut, then i meet the moon
Your vision
Long live the emperor
Is flawed
Flight of the navigator
I remember
Falling back into patterns and matters that don't matter
Quick let me look at my reflection before the porcelain shatters
Overwhelmed, they can't distinguish what i'm chasing after
Pacing backwards, nostalgic moments frozen to be saving laughter
Once a bird has seen horizon, you can't keep it caged
It'll claw its way through prison to see the waves
Birds are burdened with the knowledge of horizons promised
They know of freedom and won't stop until it flys the farthest
Harvest fondest memories and weaponize their energy
Measure me, manipulate my symmetry, to end my dreams
Tainted destiny, paint the masterpiece, it's sad to see
Keep my eyes planted in the ground, surrounded by the icicles
I chase the freedom i felt in youth as wind blew through my bicycle
My eyes behold, swollen from the truth advisable
That after battles, the shrapnel renders me unrecognizable
I seek to write my truth, that was my last sheet
I seek to slow down time, damn another fast week
You sail across the oceans to sell someone else's merchandise
I suppose your ghost will show it as just servant pride
If you prefer to lie, i flirt with pride, but never let it blur my mind
Certified demons only ever lurk at night
So i hibernate, sheltered by the sun
Snipers wait where vipers laid, and hell hurt, now i'm numb
After being cut, i swore never to expose my skin
7 Stitches, sinless riches don't exist, a syndicate
Has rid my kin of simple shit, we'll never be kids again
This is how your world will cripples kids with sedatives
Remedies get to fed to me, i'm told to let it in
Craft the fire, nightfall is on the way
I might fall and never stay, in one place
Nomadic calvary, to salvage salary
Traveled tundras, i can't be counting calories
I breathe amongst the trees to be at ease
Charged em in the west, our blood will splatter east
Deceased before we see the peace, the seed is green, i'll treat the leaves
Dancing in the flames
Victory is won by warriors and not the weapons
The pen can only be as potent as the penman
I dreamed to fruition, and i awoke a legend
If you looking high enough you can see my ascension
You hate the blade that dedicates to keep us safe
I limped across a nation, in attempts to see your face
I grieve who has fallen
Their graves close, but souls are so far, they're forgotten
I'm tired of pretending to be a fucking victim
Not trying to fix problems, i just try to outlive them
I understand who i am and that's the greatest riddle
So you and your world can only scare me by a little
I am not civil, i got people to protect, and dead to avenge
I repent for amends
Closed doors, evolve to closed caskets
I was born powerless, so i chose magic
There's so much i can't control
I'm so overwhelmed
Imagination cannot save it
With bloody hands i have crafted, in a world that i created
Running outta ink, i start writing in my blood
Weaponize my words, i start fighting with my tongue
Poison soaks the air, i invite it in my lungs
The days grown gloomy, no excitement when i'm numb
See my reflection, chimes in the wind
War torn honor, my scars shine on my skin
Would i rather lack honor, or be a slave to it
I had a dream i was a hero, i wish i stayed lucid
Village exiled, exit with my face down
When will i let go and recognize home just a place now
Do all that it takes now, they realize, i'm afraid how
Don't hear your silent cries, long as you stay loud
My lifelong fallacy, is acting as distractions
I hate when people stare, yet attention is a habit
I don't want a diagnosis, study my emotions
I do not need to be told, that i'm fucking hopeless
Smile like a model, i could be in magazines
They can't see i've lost hope, i can't imagine dreams
The pen that liberates, is the pen they live to hate
Just bury me where rivers wait, forgive my sinner traits
Watching my faith fade away
It's gone before the end of days
Assimilate the strength to win this final race
Victory is painted within blood across my face
I'm a ghost, no one knows
I'm so lost, on this road
That i chose, hold me close
You can't feel me, i tried to kill me
Plates imbalanced, placing malice
Paying taxes
Face the masses, save the magic, pacing backwards
Drift in circles, sipping purple, ripping journals
Missing virtue, hit to hurt you, this is torture
Acknowledging what they desire, i guess to fuel the fire
The light flickers and looks bleak, embers rising higher
Bear the weight of corpses, my body's morphing, can't afford this
Slit my wrists to paint the portrait, ain't it gorgeous
I'm a ghost, no one knows
I'm so lost, on this road
That i chose, hold me close
You can't feel me, i tried to kill me
Can you hear
Can you hear
With every passing day it's getting easier to live
But harder to exist, tired of waking up so sick
I walk impaled with a javelin, no balance left
Inmasculine, infatuant with death
Repetitious dreams, skepticism seems
To be the only way to truly see and the gleam
The bullshit and intentions, focus my perception
Hopeless in direction, soulless in my message
Death or bondage, nonsense i can't harness
Pathetically apathetic, regret it when i said it
Prophetically, losing touch just the way i let it
Nightmares all unfolding in the way i had dreamt it
I dont feel the way i used to, for months resort to self refusal
Distracting myself and losing focus in a way that can abuse you
I'm sorry for my neglection
I'm sorry for the tension and the purging insurrection
Parasitic paradise, i parachute to safety
Living in a world of fantasy been all that saves me
Holding on to what's already fallen
Invite poison in my vessels, cuz i'm fucking starving
What's more detrimental, grief over loss or love
Its coincidental, i'm grieving over the loss of love
Gripping with all my strength, offering all it takes
No longer i'm attached to this place, shit i'm gone without a trace
Love won't give more than it takes
Donna's been awfully quiet
Reeeeally
Yea, really
Oh my god
Well, after you told me you would defeat Pitou alone
My last question, what's the impact you want to have on the world
My impact would be: people would learn from me
In a way that they're empowered by what i taught them
It is impossible, to share the experience of clarity
How's life? everything good?
You know, it's so beautiful, especially when i'm absent from it
You feel like you're separated from the rest of the world and what's going on
Not separated at all, in fact it's the exact opposite
So that when they think of what they learned from me, they no longer think of me
They think of their own, base of understanding of how this world works
When you see more clear there is no reason
To believe anyone or believe… anything
And justice for who? for you? for some? not for us. not for our people so
Please stop saying we equal with your flag of red, white and blue in one hand
Beat us
Until we're black and blue with the other
Beat us, until we're numb
Beat us, until we can't walk straight then you put us in chains if we lucky
I become irrelevant

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