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R.J.

4:24

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I'm sitting on a jet plane down to Florida
Finally got the nerve to write back to you now
Now I'm on a train down the coast of Los Angeles
Crossing way deep down
Through the border now
While my publicist posting all my posts
Telling me about my shows
Giving me all the run arounds
I been feeling off in my head
Laying in my bed
Feeling really off yo
With my image now, yeah

I been waking up in a different place
Waking up a couple nights
Staring in space
Knowing I been feeling such a very different way
About the cameras and the lights all up in face
About the paparazzi spying on me everyday
Worrying 'bout every headline
That came my way
Worrying bout what to wear
And the style of my hair
Worrying bout if a nigga
Looking real or fake
Yeah

I'm feeling sick
Man, I wanna go home
This image of who I am now
Ain't who I've known
It's easy to lose yourself
When you ain't with your own
It's easy to lose yourself
And forget where you from
Yeah, uh

I'm feeling phony
Man, I wanna go home
My homies have quit calling
'Cause I'm never at home
My people who made me
Now they want me dethroned
'Cause I ain't the same nigga
Behind a microphone
Yeah

I'm still the same nigga
That y'all already known
Still the same nigga
That my family has known
But it pains me to say
When a nigga show his face
After so many days
I'm never really at home

It's more like
I'm really truly feeling disowned
Like a nigga right back to being unknown
'Cause of the way that the industry wanted me known
Since I they offered me a deal
And they had me sign on
Yeah

Like school kids forced to rezone
Gotta leave old friends
Find friends all on your own
While the old ones numbers become lost
Deep in the contacts
Of your cellular phone

Everybody say I'm acting so new
Like I won't from the blocks
Where all my niggas grew
Like I won't bringing them with me
Like I told everybody
That I already would do

Like I never was a man of my word
Like I never did promise them
That a man of his word
Is a man of his word
That any nigga never believing in anything that I say
Is absurd
I'm a real ass nigga
Pushing for the truth
F*ck what you heard
Listen to a nigga in the booth
Don't believe the gossipers
Or what they stirring in the news
They gotta young nigga neck in his noose
Yeah

I'm feeling sick
Man, I wanna go home
This image of who I am now
Ain't who I've known
It's easy to lose yourself
When you ain't with your own
It's easy to lose yourself
And forget where you from
Yeah, uh

I'm feeling phony
Man, I wanna go home
My homies have quit calling
'Cause I'm never at home
My people who made me
Now they want me dethroned
'Cause I ain't the same nigga
Behind a microphone
Yeah

There's almost always gonna be a deadline
Rapper suicidal over gossip in the headlines
Better be a happy ending for my unapologetic pain
'Fore they find a nigga on a shoreline

Fame ain't a game
That's needing to be played
When it's messing with your brain
So if you really wanna be
Placing all that blame
Placing all that shame
Put it on the motherfuckers
Got a nigga living via airlines

Never really want a lot of anything
I only wanted something outta life
Not the way other artists always claim
When they always scream, "F*ck poverty,"
Never give back
Iced out, in a choker chain

Everybody wanna say they from the dirt at birth
But O.G.'s know what it's worth
When they fly on a plane
Or they ride on train
Control and acclaim
All the fame that they gain
Yeah

The realest niggas always gotta die young
Tryna change the world
'Fore they mission really ever done
I'd rather go with my own
loving me
'Fore a jealous ass nigga
Try killing me with a gun

I'm the same nigga that I been
Same motherfucker that a nigga already, always will be
I don't know where this road really goes
But if its leading me
home
Please show me mercy

I'm feeling sick
Man, I wanna go home
This image of who I am now
Ain't who I've known
It's easy to lose yourself
When you ain't with your own
It's easy to lose yourself
And forget where you from
Yeah, uh

I'm feeling phony
Man, I wanna go home
My homies have quit calling
'Cause I'm never at home
My people who made me
Now they want me dethroned
'Cause I ain't the same nigga
Behind a microphone
Yeah

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