Monologue

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FLY EZ

3:25

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Stagger as I walk ain't know that I would come this far
Years of reflecting, still got some bloody scars
At the park, putting hours in with Cruz and Lenard
I was subpar, they hesitant on passing the ball
I've seen 25 years hope some more in the cards
Tray called me earlier he said you growing up dawg
And for the record I'm regretting how I made it so hard
You been special but I had to come make sure you was strong
All that pain you caused, put jealousy in my heart tho
I did the same in a different way it was too much for ma, yo
All these shorties I'm outliving
All these visions in my mind though, hope I see that shit
Somehow I'm always in a rush but now I ran out of time, seem like
Keep on telling myself it's part of the cycle though
Dying young and stressing more kind of ironic yo
Somebody close in a grave or a cell we all got it, should I try to fight it
Ignore my struggle with my ego and try to disguise it
I'm committed to ascension, now I'm bound to fly
This shit a car, without my starter I ain't got no drive
Should've spent more time with you, maybe took a ride
Should've bought some real gifts, I spent my change on dimes
Sometime I catch myself feeling like I'm not alive
Close my eyes and hear your wisdom I done tried I'm tired
Looking for was getting blinding, decided I'ma let it find me
Praying cause I need halo's around
Bring a backwood and coke for my crown
Energy maxxed they blessed who he around
With every convo it's something he put you on
And despite the roadblocks, he flew cause he kept going
A real one
Breakdown like a hesi-cross, my many flaws turn my good into a heavy floss
Deep digging out my bad habits my limitations
So these ideas could jump off of the pavement
Turbulence disturbing me, I had to fly through the hail
Autopilot stop working thought I was speeding to hell
Everyday another test, you either pass or you fail
Mile run or succumb to that pressure instead, yeah go ahead
I lost everything but I can't lose myself
I'm just, playing my hand with the cards I was dealt
Broken dreams like books on the shelf
He got, nothing to lose but he'll never cry for help
He lost everything but he can't lose himself
He just, playing his hand with them cards he was dealt
Broken dreams like books on the shelf
He got, nothing to lose but he'll never cry for help but I hear him
Never how you doing, it was always how you feeling
Never felt love just a funny fuzzy feeling
It won't come to you, some fish you gotta reel in
Temporary pleasure tryna prolong the real end
Let's try to outgrow the adolescent
Parted ways with the old E, I kinda miss him
But so much of shit been slipping out my hand
God laughing at my plan, said it's gone be bigger and different
All that I wanted was all that I had
Crippling sadness the snap to the backwards
Get in your bag or go, go get a Master's
But I'm at peace with it, time for new chapters
Swore to keep my secrecy, integrity
Until I peeped that you'll never be there for me
Muster up my muscle giving y'all what's left of me
Double up your worth, make no sense in settling
I lost everything but I can't lose myself
I'm just, playing my hand with them cards I was dealt
Broken dreams like books on the shelf
He got, nothing to lose so he'll never cry for help but I hear him
I hear him
I lost everything but I can't lose myself

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