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Da Killa KC

3:19

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Can I vent
Killa S-
Hi everyone, I got something to say
So, thank you for pressing
That button that plays
Blessings to all of the ones who have stayed
And walked by my side, instead of running away
Especially in my darkest hours
My bad if I ever f- up your day
I was on a soul search at my lowest point
When I could do nothing but pray
I lost my dad, then I lost my mind
I wanted to die, I would jump in his place
I'm not gonna lie, I was mad at the Lord
But I know deep inside I'm never gonna lose faith
I lost so much weight, was concerned with my health
I'm not gonna front, thought of hurting myself
I'm tryna dissolve all the hurt that I felt
But I wanna resolve without searching for help
Way too much pride to ever ask for that
So, I gotta just write, all I have is rap
Revealing the truth, I can't mask the facts
It all happened fast, like back to back
When it rains, it pours, I've heard it before
But now I'm sure that that saying is real
My brain is tore and my heart is sore
I can't ignore all the pain I feel, need strength to heal
So, I gotta keep my prayers up
Lord, can you hear me? I'm yearning for guidance
I'm tired of being so quiet about it
I'm crying out instead of hurting in silence
Everybody got problems, not gonna solve them
By letting these burdens define us
I don't wanna be who I almost became
I'm thankful you saved me, that's word to The Highest
Send me a sign
I just wanna know that you're proud of me
Just give me some time
To be everything I'm bound to be
You know that I'm trying
I'm breaking all these boundaries
Dividing the lines, yeah
You know that I'm trying
Send me a sign
That's all I need right now from you
You know I'll be fine
With everything I'm bound to do
Devoting my life, yeah
So, all I need right now from you
Is to feel that words, I'm proud of you
Yeah
Send me a sign
Writing this song to My Angel above
Lord, can you please give this note to My Dad
I know He'd be happy to hear I'm still rapping
And keeping the flow of my poetry tracked
He loved all my music, supported the movement
Believed in the words that I wrote on my pad
He told me to never to striving, it's all about timing
Just keep going, no holding back
But it's not the same
No, it's not the same
Yeah, I'm still tryna learn to let go of the bad
I'm tryna live up to those words you would say
You told me, No future can grow in the past
But everything's changed
Yeah, everything's changed
Every September feels lonely and sad
On holidays I feel all this pain
They're arriving again and approaching us fast
So, I gotta stay strong, cause it's what you would want
Even though this depression could put me through hell
I know you'd be proud of me, how I stayed on my feet
So many moments I could've just fell
And I'm learning to cook, not as good as you
But I'm picking it up like a book on the shelf
So, when the holidays do come around
I let Mom know she ain't gotta cook by herself
How did you do it? I'm tryna get through it
The challenge is keeping the family together
And I don't how I can calm the storm
It's impractical like tryna manage the weather
I'm seeing now how hard you tried to raise
All of us right for a chance to do better
I'm thankful forever, Sincerely, your daughter
I wish I directly could hand you this letter
I love you, Dad
Remember, guys
Don't take the ones you love around you for granted
Life is too short
I know things can get stressful sometimes, but
Cherish each other
I love you all
Da Killa KC
It's Not A Dream

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