Fuck Me

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Finbar Mac

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I got a couple of ways that I know how to function
None of 'em work, but I'm told I've got gumption

Running of fumes, running on steam is all I need
Regardless of rest I'm always weak

Can't lift an arm, lend a hand, understand
what I'm told, very frequently in need of a scold-ing

Can't seem to do right, can't seem to write well,
Can't tell the difference tween inferno and hell

Where am I now, don't have a cow, throw a fit
All of the meals I ate as of late taste of shit

Dry mouth, sour throat, linens drooled
Dreams and a high are the only reigns I rule

Drinking to forget, smoking to not remember
Where's a warm body when you need in December?

I'm told that the winter's the season for cuffing,
but Summer and Spring are when I do my fucking

Empty recitations of 'I love you's and 'Goodbye's
None of them are meant, but both transform into despise

I hate you, I want you, I need you, I'm spent
Monetize my cum so maybe I can pay the rent

Fucking would be nice if it meant that I was wanted,
But moans are temporary and my snapchat is haunted

An appropriately placed ghost in an icon on my phone
Is it me or them deciding if I get to be alone

It's definitely me, no debating whatsoever,
I change my mind so quickly, so my dates are down to never

I almost feel atrocious for the dates that I let down
But I'd rather not go on them cause I'd only sulk and frown

F*ck me for the things I do not do
I hate me and I hope you hate me too
Yeah, F*ck me if that's what you have to do
I'm here for what you want from me
Let me be your catastrophe

I've bought a shiny red nose, there's a new clown for hire
Suspenders and stripes, big shoes walking on a wire
I've learned to make a poodle from the Rubbers I don't use
I can also make a giraffe or an elephant
... or a noose

God, my Lord, oh holy one, I wish that you existed
So I could kneel and pray away the damage that this bitch did

A word I use so sparingly and only for a monster
Who struck me and berated me, then always made me calm her

I did what I was told by her, and look just where it got me,
So now I don't commit cause I'm afraid one day they'll clock me
Closed handed to the cranium, but sideways doesn't count
At least that's what the monster said, and they all trust in her account

I could've sworn in second grade they taught you not to hit
Maybe it just don't count if you think the victim's a piece of shit

Yeah, maybe I was rude, and I said things that I regret now,
But in what world does that excuse a cheekbone that is sallowed?

Apparently the world the people I thought were friends all live in,
But I don't mind, I'm rid of them, they're all nobodies and nothin's

F*ck me for the things I do not do
I hate me and I hope you hate me too
Yeah, F*ck me if that's what you have to do
I'm here for what you want from me
Let me be your catastrophe

F*ck me for the things I do not do
I hate me and I hope you hate me too
Yeah, F*ck me if that's what you have to do

Let me be your catastrophe

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