Better Than Me

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Jachin Kedar

10:00

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Yeah
Back in the City shit
Outro to the tape
Out here in Byrd crib
Yeah
Look
I feel like I been givin you way more than what I been gettin
Feel like you been missin me way more than what I been missin
I feel like when I had it, it was practice, I failed the mission
Feelin like an addict when I'm at it but failed to mention
We come from the same place she tell me its ski when I'm trippin
All across the globe shawty thick but she skinny when dippin
Learning lots about you when we argue, I'm optin to zip it
Talkin when we heated just to lead to a fiery finish
It's hard to extinguish
Tryna get you to talk is like teaching animals english
Cause you can
Mcht
I know you comprehend, but won't respond
But thats alright because I know your body language says it all
I listen to yo flaws
I click on private calls
But you only listen if you get attention in a song
So I give you what you want
And then I hear the phone but I already told you what I like to do to private calls
And its crazy cause my ex ain't even feelin like my ex yet
We split and then we met but shit
We ain't had sex since
She hit me for the bread, I try to flex and tell her next check
But I know Imma send it, I just make her wait a minute for it
Like
Ain't no need in fronting
Its enough to go around
Its just crazy like
I said its crazy cause my ex ain't even feelin like my ex yet
We split and then we met but shit
We ain't had sex since
Maybe its for the best, I mean we still'll send a text
I mean the spark is kinda there but when it's not its just a text
And I miss her and I hope she know its not just for the sex
Its the little things I know I won't be getting from the next
Like maybe the neck is better or maybe her pussy wetter
But is she gone do the things that I need her to when I get her
The title we had was cool, but a nigga needed the spinner
I know its hurt to hear that I'm givin wood like a splinter but shit
To be honest, I'll prolly feel the same way
I'm lyin if I say I can stomach it wit a straight face
But
Girl we grown so I guess we gotta grow up
You bound to lose the things you love if you don't show up
But I know what you deserve, and thats better than me
So I don't want you waitin round just to settle wit me
Shit
Better than me
I said I know what you deserve, and thats better than me
Its better niggas on this earth, its prolly better to leave
Cause Ion want you waitin round just to settle with me
Shit
Yeah
And its gonna hurt to see you go but
Shit
When you comfortable you never grow so
Yeah
BANMFAM, Bull City shit
Back in the City shit
Yeah
Since you don't know how to answer the phone anymore
Imma just let you be
It's cool
Anyways, I hope you're okay at least
I haven't heard from you in weeks
I don't even know if you're back in the city
But I do still want to see you so
Call me, text me, something so at least I know you're okay
I'll talk to you eventually I guess
Love you
Bye
So that's the last one?
Yeah, nah
I um
Nah pull up that uhh
I got one more
Michelle, close the door
Yeah
I got one more it's
It's for my niggas
Nah just, I won't even sposed to be recording this shit today
Just a lot I had to say, so
Nah it's not even for me
It's just, it's for my niggas man
So if you ain't from the city
If you ain't ever lost nobody
If you ain't one of my niggas and you don't feel this
I understand if you skip it but
Hey Ahmon look
You run into her father please tell him she really miss em
Been missin since the kid was a jit
Still in her system
We watch the movie called reminisce
She reminiscing
I know she miss the days she would sit on his lap and kiss em
The memories are so far from distant they keep her snifflin
I wipe a tear or so and then tell her she so persistent
These waves of happiness keep on comin, they inconsistent
She wanna to give me her all but I know she's feeling resistance
But me I know the difference in happiness and dependence
Like do you love for what can be given to you for instance
A chain, a diamond ring, or some flowers even attendance
We bottle our feelings until they burst, like an appendix
If this the ending then what a finish I get for penning
The ice I rock's a rock, and I copped the shit for the pendant
She hate it when I get that attention from other women
But she hate it even more when I turn around and I give it
And shit I mean I get it its givin that we committed
We fall in love with eachother but scared to even admit it, shit
Yo momma swear to God that she knew that shit from beginning
We holdin our hands and sinnin, forgive us
For trespassing we do amongst eachother
Forgive us for all the sinning we bring upon one another
My brother
I forgive em, he prolly needed it more than me
It hurts to know he felt he couldn't ask me for it cordially
But
Shit its life
The tension in the air, you could cut the shit wit a knife
Cuttin you off is easy I'll do the shit overnight
I make sure when I sever the ties that its precise
Tanjiro wit the slice, when I do it, I'm still nice
Shit, too nice in fact
I take the L and overthink like "why you do me like that ?"
Too many chances
The paper, I'm gettin plenty advances
That money gone come and go don't get caught up in that entrapment
Cause first you got all your taxes
People you payin backwards
And phonies you see on tv
And posers you see as rappers but look
Enough of that
I tend to go off on tangents
I wish I could buy you tickets to take a trip where yo dad is but
Shit wherever I'm sure that the place is better than where we currently live
I just wonder bout where it is cause shit
Man if heaven is really what reverends say it is, "paradise"
Then wouldn't it be very nice to call or send a text?
Shit, niggas could even call collect
Just to hear that voice again is easily worth a check
Just to greet em
Unfortunately I'll never get to meet em
I gotta learn all about em through teachings while easing grieving and that's
That's why I try to never complain
Or ever come off ungrateful by having both of my parents and feeling like we unstable
I mean, she say she get it nobody really deserves it
And then we discuss for hours how families are never perfect
We questioning the shit that we doin and if its worth it
We questioning the time that we spending like "whats the purpose?"
We focused on the place that we endin and not the journey
But taking eyes off the prize is the quickest way to return it
I can tell that she's yearning
Closed off by default, but communication, she's learnin
I tell her to take a breath
Everyday is a step
And every step is a victory stomping the head of misery and
Will I make it? Man thats the question of mystery
This place been crazy lately, I know we weary of memories
I just hope you remember me
And if you miss somebody, man tell em swallow ya pride
And if you love somebody, then tell em like all the time
And if somebody's helping you tell em you preciate it
Nothing really feels better than feeling appreciated
And check in on the people that's always checking on you
Cause you never truly know what a nigga be goin through
Cause pain really kills
Last saturday I'm drivin, and took my hand off the wheel, its true
But shit
Y'all ain't gotta worry it's cool
Michelle called me, and we talked, she got me back to the room
And when I got there I knew it was you
I never met em, but tell yo daddy I'm thankful that a nigga made you
Cause see that nigga saved my life and I hope you told em I'm grateful
But if you didn't its cool
I know you got alot to say to em so
Shit
Like I said man
City been kinda crazy lately
Alot of niggas that we love been
Gone too soon
One of my niggas been goin through it
And I can tell, I see that shit everyday that shit is killing em
So I wrote this verse for em
Look
Hey Ahmon look
You hear TaRon when talkin to God, try not to hobble
I know his faith in modernized churches has start to wobble
His grievances, his thoughts and his doubts is startin to squabble
He tell me that he good but in back of my mind I doubt em
I'm knowin that the stages of grief are unforgiving
And I know that depression's 

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