Dutchfalls Cove

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Anna Eisch

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I still feel a skip in my chest when someone says your name
And I freeze up for a second if they also smell the same
Sensory details have nothing for me to gain
But remind me of residual pain
And I swear that its been August for the past couple of months
The date says its November but I still think about us
And my friends tell me to give it up
It's toxic, it's not love
But I dont know what else it was
Because I was coming over
3 Days a week
Getting closer and closer
Imitating how you speak
And we would talk about
Rings and weddings, and where'd we'd wanna be
Am I foolish thinking of you and me?
And in the mornings waking up, I wish I could have paused
Cuz the look inside your eyes I swear a second it was love
And I still sit and think about it, honestly because
I'm not ready to give it up
Part of me's still pulling up, shutting off my car
Walking up your doorstep to fall into your arms
But suddenly the bells have turned into alarms
Maybe I'll never know who you are
The neighbors probably recognize me up and down the street
But the sidewalk was the only thing that was ever concrete
I wish the way I felt about it was more discreet
But I still keep that one mall receipt
Oh I was coming over
Right as the traffic hit
And in full disclosure
Dont think I'll forget
When I met your mom
And dad, and they laughed, about the way we met
But I know they knew who I was before that
And the late nights when we stayed up, I wish I could rewind
Cuz the way I think about it now may just be in my mind
Well I guess I'll reminisce and then maybe in time
I'll mean it when I say that I'm fine
But I'm not fine
Did you really expect me to be?
Oh if I had a dime for every time
You led me on I'd be so rich its filthy
Oh do you even feel bad?
For letting it go on for so long?
Now I feel like a psychopath, cuz I got attached
Now you say all along I had it all wrong
Denying how you feel wont make it simply go away
And ignoring it with another bitch wont make it more ok
I never called a flag on all the foul play
But you're the main thing that I work through in therapy
I'm not fine
And how could I be?
You can keep feeding me lies like I'm deprived
Why do you try to care about me when I know about Emily

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