The Pit

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Erases Eraser

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It's the first, second, third time you've sabotaged yourself like this
You've kept me from attending college even though
I've had an inoperable brain tumor, and not only that
You've destroyed every relationship you've ever had, including ours
I can deal with it when you mistreat me, but when you treat our family like it's a burden,
A non-issue, a nuisance, that's what I can't fucking stand

Do you think your children, friends, relatives enjoy being with an abuser?
No one's buying your little narrative that this is normal
You can't isolate your children
Everyone knows what you're doing is wrong

Eighteen days at the luxury hotel, bothering the hotel staff and
Slowly tricking them into thinking you really work there, and
You think you're Mister Hot Shit Breath Don't Smell Rockerfeller
You've come crashing back down to earth, into a drain of a life
That quickly destroys your ambitions and dreams
You deserve it

Piece of shit cocksucker mother fucker
Think you can write intel x86 assembly because you can copy and paste code
From the lesser-known tags on Stack Overflow?
Stick to what you know:
Masturbating, hand-coloring paper asylums for children via crayon
Absorbing self, and indulging
You don't know jack shit
Every single one of your coworkers knows that
You're a sorry excuse for an architect
Not a planner or a mathematician, a measurer or designer
Rather a bean counter, or a social magician
Who can hide behind his own petty manipulations and appearances
Keep taking everything in your life for granted, f*ck face

Into the trenches you go again
You have briefly slipped into the terrifying stage of life
Where others around you begin to trick you into thinking you're going insane
Rock music? Architecture School?
Nine Wellington Wood Academy years and letter jackets
Were all pissed away in the great Heroin Frenzy of '17

Your children hate you, they don't even know who you are
They used to ask about you when they were little,
"Where's Daddy? Where's Daddy?"
And I would have to be put into the unenviable position of telling them
That their dad would rather be doing something else
Something "more important"
But over time, they stopped asking, and they stopped caring
They grew into the violent, impulsive, borderline psychotic
Angst-ridden teenagers we have now
Instead of spending time with your children, you've opted for
A less favorable way to spend your time
To be right-hand bitch to an aspiring hitman with
Steel-string marimbas and forty cylinders
"Pwease wet me pway tambowine with you!"
No kids allowed bitch, turn the phone off and tell your wife to chill the f*ck out

"F*ck you, Dad!" your daughter Jacqueline shouted at you
And carved into your Mercedes at the age of 13
She said it to you again last week, too, over Frosted Flakes
"F*ck you, Narrator."
Your son is blackmailing his female classmates into sending him
Pornographic pictures of themselves
Did you or did you not block it out when little Narrator Jr.
Mutilated a defenseless lamb by cutting its leg off in a farmhouse in 2004?
He even threw the leg in the pond to try to kill a toad with it
Your children are showing signs that serial killers exhibit at an early age

You never gave a f*ck
The one opportunity you really had in life
Which was the Young Entrepreneurs and Part Time Republicans Club in high school
You pissed away because you really wanted to do ketamine at the Dave Matthews concert
You ignored every call from your fellow members you ever got
I know because I was there
No, we didn't have a romance at that point, I was your friend's
Ugly pain in the ass girlfriend for two years
While you were off banging every Betty, Polly, and Sue
With big eyelashes and more tits than brain cells
F*ck you
If I ever needed a morsel of self-esteem or positive self image
It was during the mistake of my life that was meeting you
I have trouble believing that you didn't just marry me because
I was the safest option with the least amount of effort

When your son Narry Junior was 8, and you were 34
You had come home from the casino after losing $10,000
And drinking a fifth of Max Wellman
Your son had created a model Empire State Building
Out of 30,000 lego bricks
With perfect symmetry, color shading, and geometric angles
He kept showing me all night
"Look at it now, Mommy!"
"Copper legos next to the gold legos, with silver on top"
You threw a sock full of pennies at his head and
He tumbled into his own creation
Scattering his carefully selected two-centimeter-wide bricks
Around the room, and turning his masterpiece into a pile of ruins
You laughed in his face as he lie bleeding with a black eye and
Snot running into his gaping, heartbroken mouth
I would have yelled at you until my lungs collapsed if
I wasn't afraid you were going to kill me

And then came the cheating
The first time I left you in 2006, I thought I was done with your bullshit and I was finally free
But no
You came running back to me, grovelling, begging, promising me you'd change
Read: telling me everything you thought I wanted to hear
I saw the pictures of the women you'd fucked on your phone
Saw the lipstick on your collar even though you thought you'd hidden it from me
I confronted you countless times
Every one of those times, I thought it was the last time

One day you will rot
With that, I'm leaving and I'm taking the kids!
I want you out of the house by Monday!
If you're still here on Monday I'm calling the police
Don't call me
I'm not at my parents, and I'm certainly not staying at my sister's
I'll be at the Sheraton with a stranger I picked up
That looks like you from ten years ago
If you hurt me, try to contact me, contact my family
Harass me, stalk me, or manipulate our children in any way
I will file a restraining order. You will not win this
If I have my way in court you'll never see the kids again

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