Bored To Death

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silouan suiter

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I thought I'd found the inner peace
To sit and listen to you talk about 'the industry'
Without writing books in my head
An uninteresting villain
The holy judgement of the bored to death
I thought I was patient
I thought I was young and stupid then
I thought I was different
I thought I was born again, again, again
If I'd went back to graduate
I wouldn't be at this table to hear you bitch about the welfare state,
The supply chain, and the nerve of the kids today
I'd be in my favorite tie
And my inscrutable shirt
Teaching the nervous kids all the ways to fake their way
Through the pledge of allegiance
And amazing grace
For purely hypothetical pay
When the middle of the country doesn't love you like they used to
And they take you off the TV for the sake of a reduction in harm
And you can't afford to live in the building where you learned all your lessons
And you can't stomach the brutalist kitsch that you'd mistaken for charm
There is an opposite of youth
And it isn't wisdom
It isn't whispered at the dinner when you get up for air
The thing that you're afraid that we'll think
It can't be counted on fingers
Or carved into the bar with a key
It isn't the wine and it isn't the wafer
It isn't rare but it isn't free
Confessor, I am the penitent asshole
You and I we always knew
But you're still the one
With the parapets and the thumbscrews
But you're still the one
With the parapets and the thumbscrews
But you're still the one
With the parapets and the thumbscrews

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