a poem to you

After HoursAfter Hours 

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After Hours

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This is a poem
Looking into the past, feeling the bridge start to break
I've been scattered all over the place, trying to fix my mistakes
Want to be free, want to be heard, but sometimes I start to trip
Pride is the devil, I stooped to his level, knowing I can't even handle this shit
I've worked day by day, tireless nights
Resting wherever I can
Played with my deck, was never content
So I lost all the cards in my hand
I traded a home for a shelter with a pretty front
Not knowing what was inside, I took a deep dive
Saw that my home was always enough
And I was seeing the world with different eyes
I struggle daily to fix my mentality
Knowing I won't be the same
I wish I listened to mother and father cuz they always were driving me the right way
I wish that I could be proud of the things I've achieved
But right now I feel like I've changed
Changed for the better or worse
My ambitions a curse, but people don't see it that way
I've been chasing after a bag, so I barely know how to rest
I've been fighting myself in my head for so long, no wonder they call life test
I've been writing and jotting ideas down
Hoping that my life becomes nun but the best
I wish that I could love like I used too
I wish I could live with no regrets

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