SmokeTillMyLungsTurnBlack

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Am Just Mist

3:15

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Everything sucks but that life bro
Gotta keep your head up you aint wanna let go
The pain will come and the pain will go
Gotta be patient gotta let life control
I know suicide is running through your mind
And you wanna let go of your life every time
The girl of your dreams left you behind
Now your stuck in the dust and you feel like you are blind
All of these thoughts in my head they are loud
I'm losing my function guess ima shut down
I feel so annoyed all I hear are these sounds
Voices upstairs and a thump on the ground
I'm loosing my parents they goin to court
Cause sooner or later they gon get divorced
My mom is upstairs leaving tears on the floor
While my dad in the jeep ballin out to his core
Ignoring the pain by taking night walks
I smoke in the rain to gather my thoughts
I'm keeping my rage all locked in a box
I keep it contained so it doesn't talk
I self medicate
To keep me from dying
I won't fade away
From the weed that I'm buying
But I'll levitate
To keep me from crying
Planned to have date
But you would keep lying
Left me on delivered for a couple hours
Thinking that you fake, thinkin you are a coward
Saw you on your phone, your online
I don't wanna date a bitch that don't wanna be mine
So I smoke till my lungs turn black
I don't need you in my life so please don't come back
Ima fade away in the night
I wanted you by my side
You don't pick up the phone anymore
What if I'm having seizures on the floor
You wouldn't care you would leave and ignore
My eyes shedding tears, when my eyes cry they pour
What the f*ck is life, I don't even know
Know I'm scared to go outside, I don't open up my door
There's a reason why I'm scared and a reason why I'm slow
Man I'm seeing all my demons, its trippy, I better go
All these faces haunting me like their nightmares
Feeling hot and I'm sweating in my night terrier
Its a stage fright, ya they don't play fair
I'm scared, these drugs are a nightmare
You say you care about me
Stop the lying, you do not
You don't want me in your life
I might as well go kick some rocks
I'm so sorry, I'm not here
Girl you playin wit my fears
Want my soul to disappear
Ya my face covered with tears
Woke up
I don't wanna live no more
I'm caring all the pain around its dragging on the floor
I stood up
Saw a text from my phone
Saying "f*ck you bitch" but all I did was ignore
I don't wanna live in this crazy world
All my suicide thoughts were never heard
Not a single fucking person took a second and listen
To what I had to say about my depression addition
I self medicate
To keep me from dying
I won't fade away
From the weed that I'm buying
But I'll levitate
To keep me from crying
Planned to have date
But you would keep lying
Left me on delivered for a couple hours
Thinking that you fake, thinkin you are a coward
Saw you on your phone, your online
I don't wanna date a bitch that don't wanna be mine
So I smoke till my lungs turn black
I don't need you in my life so please don't come back
Ima fade away in the night
I wanted you by my side
You don't pick up the phone anymore
What if I'm having seizures on the floor
You wouldn't care you would leave and ignore
My eyes shedding tears, when my eyes cry they pour

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