Stranger i Call "Me"

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Alkeme

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This stranger that I call me
Is weighing my soul down
Wish I had some time to breathe,
Anxiety, waves at me just as I drown
I'm not going out right now no no
Going through a lot right now oh oh
And everything won't be okay
Don't wanna fight through another day
All the secrets I keep
To appease your belief
That I'm safe as my soul decays
Another shit storm is underway
This typhoons become a hurricane
It's torn through me entirely
I can see that a cyclone is on its way
I see no way out and I'm done searching
For the solution that'll make me perfect
Tired destitute and I feel worthless
Shattered as I'm working through
Is it really worth it
Accustomed, I sense the coming pain
I feel it numbing and it starts to fade
It's a wonder to me how the f*ck I'm living
When I die every fucking day
And all this
Fear (Fear it) it (Tries) tries to
(To haunt) haunt me
My (My heart) heart (It feels) it
Feels too (Too heavy) heavy
Too numb to feel the wind
Don't ever see how this will end
This stranger that I call me
Is weighing my soul down
Wish I had some time to breathe
Anxiety, waves at me, just as I drown
You speak unequivocally
Ambitions they melt now
This stranger that I call me
Anxiety, but my brain just won't slow down
Pain (Pain) it lies (It lies), and
Hides (Hides), behind
My rage, (Rage) as cries
Of mine, subside
Been slayed, though still it stays
As feelings slip and fade away
They fade away
I don't wanna talk right now, nope
I don't wanna visit
I don't wanna sit and listen
I don't need a fucking pill
Or another reason why I'm sick
Like is this it, wish that it
Was a zit, I could pop
When I am not responsive
Or over the top
Cause I'm gonna fucking snap
No I'm not overreacting
My words I don't redact em
My way of speaking's tactical
Practically you enact systems
That unpackaged the very fabric
Of what your brain cannot manage
Your trauma's the damage
Bleeds into your actions
And now everyone around you is just acting
No rhyme or reason just poisonous atoms
Faith cancelled out by the pain you can't handle
Wondering if this how
You're dismantled
Your sanity slipping
Your mind's being handled
And all that you hear is
Your brain being scrambled
This apathy's taken you
Move if you can but
Anxiety's grip, makes you
Think that you can't
As your self loathing thoughts
Begging forcing you out
I don't know why you try
When you'll f*ck up no doubt
Foolishness fuels as you're killing yourself
But despite all this madness
And pain being dealt
You reside in the sadness
And calm of yourself
And the sickness sets in
As you'll go back around
With this stranger you know
Who inhabited self
This stranger that I call me
Is weighing my soul down
Wish I had some time to breathe
Anxiety, waves at me, just as I drown
You speak unequivocally
Ambitions they melt now
This stranger that I call me
Anxiety, but my brain just won't slow down

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