Act 1. Hasa Diga Eebowai

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Year:

2011

4:24

1,157 Views

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MAFALA
In this part of Africa, we ALL have a saying – whenever something bad happens, we just throw our hands to the sky and say HASA DIGA EEBOWAI!

ELDER CUNNINGHAM
Hasa Diga Eebowai?

MAFALA
It's the only way to get through all these troubled times. There's war, poverty, famine...but having a saying makes it all seem better!

There isn't enough food to eat
Hasa Diga Eebowai
People are starving in the street
Hasa Diga Eebowai
Hasa Diga Eebowai!
Hasa Diga Eebowai!

ELDER PRICE
Well, that's pretty neat!

ELDER CUNNINGHAM
Does it mean no worries for the rest of our days?

MAFALA
Kind of!

We've had no rain in several days (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)
And eighty percent of us have AIDS (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)
Many young girls here get circumcised
Their clits get cut right off (Way oh!)
And so we say up to the sky
Hasa Diga Eebowai!
Hasa Diga Eebowai!
Hasa Diga Eebowai!

Now you try! Just stand up tall, tilt your head to the sky, and list off the bad things in YOUR life.

ELDER CUNNINGHAM
Somebody took our luggage away (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)

ELDER PRICE
The plane was crowded and the bus was late (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)

MAFALA
When the world is getting you down
There's nobody else to blame (Way oh!)
Raise your middle finger to the sky
And curse his rotten name

ELDER PRICE
Wait, what?

ELDER CUNNINGHAM
Hasa Diga Eebowai! (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)
Am I saying that right?

ELDER PRICE
Excuse me, sir, but what EXACTLY does that phrase mean?

MAFALA
Well, let's see...'Eebowai' means 'God', and 'Hasa Diga' means 'F*CK YOU'. So I guess in English it would be, "F*ck you, God!" (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)

ELDER PRICE
What?!!

MAFALA
When God fucks you in the butt (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)
F*ck God right back in his cunt (Hasa Diga Eebowai!)

Hasa Diga Eebowai! (F*ck you, God!)
Hasa Diga Eebowai! (F*ck you, God!)

ELDER PRICE
Excuse me, sir, but you should really not be saying that. Things aren't always as bad as they seem.

MAFALA
Oh, really? Well, take this fucking asshole, Mutumbo, here. He got caught last week trying to rape a baby.

ELDER PRICE
What!? Why?

MAFALA
Some people in his tribe believe that having sex with a virgin will cure their AIDS. There aren't many virgins left, so some of them are turning to babies.

ELDER PRICE
But...that's horrible!

MAFALA
I know!

(Hasa Diga Eebowai!)
Here's the butcher, he has AIDS
Here's the teacher, she has AIDS
Here's the doctor, he has AIDS –
Here's my daughter she has A...
...wonderful disposition!
She's all I have left in the world
And if either of you lays a hand on her –
I will give you my AIDS!

If you don't like what we say 
Try living here a couple days
Watch all your friends and family die
Hasa Diga Eebowai!
F*ck you!

Hasa Diga Eebowai!
F*ck you, God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt-a
F*ck you, God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt-a
F*ck you, God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt-a
F*ck you in the eye!

Hasa Diga Eebowai! 
F*ck you, God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt-a
F*ck you, God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt-a
F*ck you, God, in the ass, mouth, and cunt-a
Hasa – f*ck you in the other eye!

Hasa Diga Eebowai! 
F*ck you, f*ck you God
Hasa Diga Eebowai! 
F*ck you, f*ck you God
Hasa Diga Eebowai! 
F*ck you, f*ck you God

Hasa Diga!
F*ck you God!
In the cunt!

 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer