Solace

I find Solace in being alone at family functions When you get older you see the flaws in how your family functions Cousin on dope he out of his mind But all this time I thought he was great thought he was doing fine But now But now I just see his flaws Crazy all the time I see him struggling with withdrawals Then they ask me why I don't smoke Then they ask me why I don't drink I heard it from himself he can't even think without his weed Cuz I see the damage it do Nothing new this a generational problem down to me and you Kid pill poppers tell me something new Why does the news got to Focus on who killed who Like I just wanted to see the wether Now I'm questioning should I watch the news ever Its all fake It's all bloated propaganda Drinking my orange Fanta While me and grandmama banter Over another shooting Over another shooting Roll the clip But please be advised this is nothing like the movies And they we go to sports And act like nothing happened 1 min ago a mommas baby died And now we laughing I'm sorry I guess it's our way of Coping with the madness What a tragic life So we get high to fly away Fly away to fly away yeah So we get high to fly away Fly away to fly away yeah And this on the Daily Thinking to myself like that somebody's baby But I don't care I got my check in the mail About to cop a new pair Just to flex to my friends Away I don't want your money I just want your love Thought many times my hope fell like autumn leaves My soul never grew frail In times of need I kept consistent in hopes that one day I might succeed That day coming I can feel it like a autumn breeze Constantly looking for the key to life through others dogma I'm trying to find the bright side to every problem But that's hard when your baggage full of family trauma All I ever wanted was peace but I ain't no Dalai Lama But I found in it my music Maybe one day I'll get it perfect I'm only human Feeling lucid I'm floating through sound waves feeling muted I'm track to be a great but there ain't no rubric to follow Felling hollow from people cutting me short Can't question my drive can't question my heart Can't question my vision Turn 180 like Torque Maybe one day Ill find solace in all of my words Where did it go I do not know Where did it go I do not know I remember it's was summer 2016 Big dreams was the only thing on my mind Didn't think a year later grandpa would've died And I stay in bed cuz there's stress on my mind Yeah Don't even wanna go outside Rather stay in the house and Reminisce on them times But it led to the music and I thank God for it Started making beats and it's was hard to ignore them So I guess I started rapping in silence Searching for guidance Late nights in my room I was rhyming Keep it a secret something I regret Then granny died wow look at the timing Well then I wrote When I Come Home As a memoir to remember the things that we did And that's something that I'll never forget So I write these memories so I can live them again Where did it go I do not know Where did it go I do not know