Intro (December Already)

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Horse Hunters

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Hello, we are the Horse Hunters
A group primarily composed of four individuals
From distinctly similar and uninteresting backgrounds
We have come before you today to bring you a sample of our work
An LP, if you will
The creation of this album sought to bring us closer together
To have all of us in the recording studio at once
To celebrate the season that we all love so much
It is because of this love that we have for the Christmastime period
That we felt that this album deserved to be crafted with the utmost respect
For both the history of the holiday
And the positive emotions that Christmas invokes in people all around the world
These feelings involve love, security, safety, nostalgia, comfort, belonging
But for some it may also invoke unpleasant memories
And we wished to also respect those in our music as well
I'm very, very pleased that you've decided to join us
Because I can't help but feel that this work is the magnum opus of the Horsehunters collective
A culmination of our expedition
I understand that before listening to an album, everyone has some basic questions
It's not unlike signing the terms and conditions of a legal agreement
By skipping this introduction, you are skipping those terms and conditions
The questions that you have are likely not the same questions that someone else will have
So I will briefly attempt to answer ALL possible questions in broad, sweeping strokes
So as to wipe away the muddy water covering your windshields
So without further ado, here are the answers to every question
We are named the Horse Hunters
Though legally speaking we have never hunted a horse
And we never will hunt a horse
(Yes we have, and yes we will)
We are amateur equine predators in name and name only
And I say this only to alleviate the rumours that we were responsible for the rise of the motor car
We were not, and frankly we oppose the movement
(Yes we are, and no we don't)
In regards to every question that would imply doubts concerning the quality of what you are about to listen to
I have only one thing to say to you
Wait and see, for there there is no better critic to listen than that of your own mind
To answer every other question, I suggest that you rewind
For you will no doubt find your answer somewhere earlier in this recording
With the basics out of the way, let me introduce
A Very Horse Hunting Christmas

Okay, g'day guys
Um... this one's gonna be a bit of a crooner
So you've got my permission to grab your missus tight
And rock your way to the dance floor
Not that it looks like this guy needs my permission anyway
Hope you all have a beautiful night
And I hope you enjoy the album
Stay with us

Is it December already? I swear
September was just last month
I'm sorry if I seem unsteady
Oh, the boys gave me a beer... or a bunch
Air that's so hot
You could fry an eggy

Seatbelts and slides with that certain subtle touch
A beer with a girl
Who's most definitely preggy
And a family of three who all want to cuddle up

Hearing your wife sing is kinda exhilarating
When the family gathers 'round for a song
Oh, my son's schizophrenia is getting wildly debilitating
But I'm sure it won't last for too long
Lo-lo-lo loooo

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