Pain

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Kyle Landon

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I'd rather die than see you again
I'd rather die than still be your friend
I'd rather die than see how this ends
I'd rather die than start life again
Pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain

Everyone I grew up with disappointed that I ain't die yet
Cuz I ain't try yet
I'm not alive yet
I tell ya

They'll all talk about what a shame it is
But don't feel sorry for me
I deserved all of this

So why did none of you ever reach out
Why were you all deaf to my hoarse shouts
One percent boy ninety nine percent doubt
Don't be surprised if I take an early out

Always threw away everything that I had
Always wished that I had reasons to be sad
I'm barely hanging on by a strand
I bury all of my hope in quicksand

I'd rather die than see you again
I'd rather die than still be your friend
I'd rather die than see how this ends
I'd rather die than start life again
Pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain

I hope they open my eyes in that casket
I'll stare right through you know you cant mask it
My soul will ensure your future is tragic
The stress from my death will cement your habits

When I kill myself don't come to my service
I hope you remain forever so nervous
You will get over it quickly I promise
That's the one line where I'm totally honest

I want to start over
Leave all you behind 
Change my name and my residence
I'll be forgotten in time

I'm just returning the things that you have given me
Stress and depression and hatred and envy
Just like Jesus I loved all of my enemies
Bible to sleep, then organ failure remedy

I give up, 
I finally just had enough
Deleted that music stuff
Around my throat is a hand cuff

I don't ever want to see my face again
I'll burn it off instead
I'll turn my mattress red
Disfigured but not yet dead

I'd rather die than see you again
I'd rather die than still be your friend
I'd rather die than see how this ends
I'd rather die than start life again
Pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain

Pain is knowing that you exist
Pain is knowing I'm too scared to exit
Pain is knowing this will come again
Pain is knowing I'll push away every friend

Pain is knowing that I am me
Pain is knowing that I don't know me
Pain is knowing that I can't change me
Pain is knowing

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