Father

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Austin Joyce

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Days till we decease decrease as time goes on
One day you're right next to them, (snap) then they're gone 
Stings from the distance, but the memories still carry on
Look towards the light, he fights, finally calm
Push aside, I just cry, and try, to flee and run
Standby, asking why, he died, Your Will be done
Strong ties, with a life, resides, his flesh and blood
I sigh, mesmorized, the lies, fill up my tongue
My dad died, by the time, I arrived, couldn't say bye
His lungs fried, by some medicine a dentist shouldn't prescribe
Some carelessness by a man
Really cost me my father
Sueing, but money won't bring him back
So why even bother
Septocane substitutes as a nova replacement
There's no replacing my only dad, so why did you take him
I don't understand your plan, but I'm trying To trust you
You've always been there when I needed you most to come through
It's a blessing that I saw him two days prior
Cause a virus
Took the small moments that we shared with similar athletic desires
I reminisce on the times you would watch me play ball
The nervousness crept up on me in between every call
The whole time, in my mind, I just want impress you
Hopefully you were blessed to
Have a son to attest to
I hope that you're proud of who I have become
When it's set and done
When you sit around and ponder 
God why did you take my father!

Lord, Lord, Lord
Free my soul from all this hurt
My whole life was good with words
Can't seem to come to terms
With the life you took from me
On my knees I beg and plead
God... I hope this is the end
Of this pain I'm dealing with

Rage goes uncaptured
This is a snapshot
Of what it feels in a 
Rapture
Control is my Master
Feeding off of disaster
Man this seems super backwards 
Why do I always revert
Never want to converse 
It keeps on making this worse 
But Christ still makes me His first 
And now I see a different side of things
You gonna see a different side of me
Not picking parts of life, to decide to piece
But addressing all sides, for Your eye to see
My modesty
Breeds from the hardest feats
A part of me 
Don't try to startle me 
I know I'm weak
But ima keep running hard until you work is finished and I'm six feet deep
I know my mama crying alongside the couch
God only knows I'm tryna figure it out
I know we're tempted to hold in the doubt
But I know it's so easy to let it slip out  
My life, I've been set apart
My life, I've been on a mission 
I know that I can end up missing, but the point of the matter is to never give in
When things aren't going our way
But God still gives me His Grace
Death, I never wanna THINK about it
But I THINK about it to this day
Now I'm trying to figure out where I am
Showing to my fam where I stand 
See You right there holding out Your hand
But I hope I'm grabbing it, in time for prayer 
Now, I'm back tryna think through the back and forth inside my mind
I know I should of understood your Holy and unfailed design
Lord, I always wanna be your child
I still wanna trust in you
But it's really hard when I see my dad's dead body there with no function
But I know this is time I should give to you
I know that you deserve my relentless praise 
And To praise Your name for a life that was blessing me every single one of my days 
Lord I represent you in his honor
Through you we will not falter
I may have lost a dad, but I'll always have my Father

Lord, Lord, Lord
You freed my soul from all this hurt
My whole life was good with words
But through You I've come to terms
With the life that's gone from me
On my knees I beg and plead
God... I know this is the end
Of this pain I'm dealing with

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