Pickled Thief

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Mangled Crow

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Caught you red-handed, you blue-bellied, yellow-livered son of a gun

Here's the deal, buddy boy
You've gone and done me dirty
Left me feelin' real exposed and raw
So I hope you're feelin' thirsty

Now to paint a clearer picture,
Let's start with how we met
You left me your calling card
In the carpet of my wreck

Spelled out in broken glass
I saw the backseat window smashed
My speakers and my sub were gone
And you broke my trunk's pull tab

Well, I went on down to a winery
Got myself an old oak cask
Spent two weeks cleanin' it on out
And another trackin' you down

You see my friend, your fate is sealed
Left me no real good choice
Gonna putcha in that there barrel
I'ma leave ya there for months

But let's look at the bright side pal
You're lookin to eat real fine
Got all sorts of goodies for ya
It's not likely that you'll die

Not too quick at least,
Or at least that's what I hope
You'll have plenty in there to look at
So get used to your new home

25 gallons of rice vinegar
A dozen cloves of garlic
Whole container of red pepper flakes
2 whole bags of kosher salt

Bouqet of local dill weed
Followed by a full grown man
Top it off with some peppercorn
Water up to the fill line

Now I haven't done any stealin',
And I doubt you do much cookin'
But tonight at least, for different reasons
You and I are both Picklin' Thieves

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